Drinknation Forums

[Bippo]

I have been bartending for a while now, it always amuses me the strange demographic of people who we serve.

1- The Hospitality Staff - Knows so much about the job, cant make a decision. They will even go so far as to recommend that you should get <insert brand name here>. Usually the most understanding when you are flat out busy though and more often than not will tip you.

2- The Scrooge - Will give you $10.30c so you can give them $2 change, thus no tip.

3- The One Liner - Orders each drink one at a time which takes twice as long. Even if you ask them if there is anymore, they wont tell you all at once. You just feel like saying to them " It would have all been done if you said that all at once"

4- The Money Grabber - Wont pull any notes out of their wallet until you tell them the whole price, then they hand you a $50 note anyways.

5- The Add-on - "Is that all sir?" "Um Yes" then just as you start to change their money. . . *yells to friend* "What are you drinking phil?"

6- The First Timer - "Do you have Baileys?"

7- The Clock Watcher - "Isnt it happy hour now?"

8- The Undecided - "Do you sell JD here?" "Yes" "Ok, just a beer thanks"

10- The Rude Asshole - "Hi Sir, How are you?" "RUM!" Sometimes i just want to give it to them neat and watch them get pissed off, "I meant with coke!" "ohh, i thought you just said rum, my mistake."

12- The Beer Drinker - Will look at the bartender seriously and say, "Just a Beer Thanks" and continue talking to their mates.Hmmmm, which one exactly?

13- The You Decide - Wants the bartender to decide what they would offer. Really has no idea what they want, and will tell the bartender, "But i dont like, tequila, OJ, mangos, strawberries, or beer."

14- Hell in Happy Hour - Your 4 deep at the bar, middle of happy hour, and one loser asks "Can i get a weak de-caf skinny latte"[/b]

[The Archvillain Bartender]

Ha ha, I like your categorizations. It's even worse when you get customers in multiple categories, like the Add-on Beer Drinker, or the Rude Asshole One-Liner.

[IdiotNotSoSavant]

Ever Get these

RIF - reads the drink menu for an hour then orders a rum and coke. (reading is fundamental)

the Poser - has been standing there for 1/2 an hour with ice and 3 drops of booze left in their glass but doesn't want another and won't let you take the glass.

the VanWinkle - only orders whiskey or beer. Tells you how in his/her day they didn't have all these fancy vodkas and such. He would walk 2 miles uphill in the rain to get some bourbon.

The Deb (Debutant) - walks into an Irish pub asking "What kind of champagne do you have" "Uhh, I can put some Coors in a champagne glass if ya like?" Stop watching the simple life and get a life!

The Seka - more upscale than a barfly. Before there is any real hard evidence, before she asks for a shot of Everglo, before you even see the tongue ring, you just know she's getting naked with someone at the bar that night.

what you call the One liner we call the ADD - rather than telling you the whole order at once, Orders one drink at a time, once you've finished making it, then they give you another drink.

Thelma and Louise - look fine now but they order weird sweet drinks like shots of Jaeger with blakberry brandy and you know in a few minutes they'll be over the edge, puking.

[Wimp]

Yuppers!
I've got them all at my bar! LOL!

[Guest]

yes I have those customers, but do you have the wannabe hip hopper who orders a shot of Jack Daniels but wants it served to him in a snifter? Oh yeah, and with a splash of coke.

[The Archvillain Bartender]

ugh! hip-hoppers! get off my damn lawn, you kids!