Wordsmithing is becoming a lost art. With phrases such as "u r such a n00b" becoming much more common than "Sir, I have acutely observed your obtuse interactions and concluded that your dexterity under exigency is aspirant at best", we had decided earlier this week to write a Internet-English dictionary, compiling all the common phrases and shortcut language of the internet and translating them once and for all. We gave the task to our crack team of typewriter monkeys, who responded by making "ook" noises and grooming themselves. Things were fine until they got bogged down on the acronyms "mt" and "mal", and decided to represent every letter "m" with the word "muffin". We had to abandon the whole thing when they got bored with that solution and simply ate the "m" keys. So instead of a comprehensive, all-knowing internet dictionary, you just get regular drink of the week. We fervently anticipate that you shant deplore such a happenstance. Or rather, "oh noes, were sry!